Water

I'm not sure what the reason is but being in or around water has always made me feel better.  From my earliest days wading the creek in front of my grandparent's house, through those winter days of skating on the ice of that same creek frozen over, to the later days of being by a lake or a river fishing to being on a beach watching the ocean, feeling the ocean breezes and smells, lulled into a sense of peacefulness by the sounds of the waves rolling up on the beach I've always loved being in or near water.

Even rain makes me feel better.  I don't mind being out in the rain.  In fact, while growing up. I rather enjoyed being caught in storms while out wandering the woods.  To this day I love storms and like to sit on my (very small) porch when there is a storm and watch the rain, listen to the thunder and feel the wonderful, freshness of the air around me.

Some years ago, my brother owned  a house on the river bank up in Kentucky.  When I had something on my mind I'd drive up there (a good 425 miles) and just take a fishing pole and go sit on a sandbar and watch the water and think.  What the fish did or did not do was purely secondary.  Several important decisions in my life were made on that sandbar watching the water of the Big Sandy River roll past.

We've  not been able to go for the past several years but my wife and I used to go to Myrtle Beach or another beach every September.  We'd walk to our favorite place for breakfast then walk that breakfast off down to the end of the boardwalk area and back to the hotel up Ocean Boulevard.  We'd sit in the hotel and watch TV (we always got the rooms with two TVs) and read and drink wine until the shadows came over the beach.  Then we'd go for long walks on the beach.

I'd get out in the edge of the ocean and my wife would stay farther up the beach and run from the encroaching waves as the tide came in.  We both loved to watch the little birds following the receding waves looking for food then running, helter skelter, in front of the new waves coming in to avoid being covered up in water.

I always felt a sense of longing when we'd pass a fisherman or two sitting on a bucket with two or more fishing rods with lines way out in the surf, relaxing and waiting for a fish to come along and feel like making itself available for supper.  I guess those days are over for me now though.  I can't visualize my left leg ever getting well enough for long walks on the beach any time.

When I lived in Florida, my brother had a 23 1/2 foot inboard/outboard boat that we used to take out into the Atlantic most every weekend.  Let me tell you there is something different about being way out in the gulf stream and looking around and there is no sign of land in any direction.  And, if you have not seen  a sunrise and/or sunset over the ocean with no land around you have really missed something.  I can really understand why men fall in love with the sea.  And if you've never had really fresh saltwater fish you've missed out on the best fish there is to eat.  We'd go out and catch all the fish a restaurant patron pays though the nose for and feast on a large fish fry on Sundays.  We'd use three hooks on each line and most times catch at least two fish at a time and lots of times have a fish on each hook.  I'd get so tired from reeling in the fish at times I'd just leave my pole in the holder and crack open a beer and sit back and just enjoy being out on the water.

My wife and I took a cruise for our wedding/honeymoon and I would highly recommend a cruise to anyone thinking of taking one.  Not so much for the stops as those were so orchestrated and limited one too much to the places, shops, tours that had deals with the cruise lines they were not that great.  But, the sea days were wonderful.  Grab breakfast early then grab a book and go to one of the areas in one of the lounges and just lie on the ledge by a window overlooking the ocean and read.  Or, go out on deck where the wind was fierce (top deck was hard to even stand upon) and soak in the wind and ocean smell and the view. 

I have two really morbid fears of ways to die.  One is by hanging and the other is by drowning.  I can't say where hanging came from but the love for the ocean I have and the fear of drowning that goes with it makes me believe I may have been a sailor who ended up drowning in one of my past lives.  That and women.  With all my problems with woman in this life I must have treated an awful lot of women really badly in my past lives to warrant it. 

That is one reason, when I am beyond drowning, I'd like the remains of my cremated body dumped (no there is no need for a kinder way of saying it) into Nat's Cree, Ky near where I was born.  The symmetry appeals to me for some reason.  The completion of the circle.  Ending up in those waters where I spent so many happy days of my  youth.  I know it is really meaningless as I won't know anything about it at the time but while I'm still here to think about it, it does appeal to me.

In my next life I want to live on an island somewhere with lots of mountains and rushing streams of pellucidly clear, clean, running water.  Miles of beaches to relax on with loads of fresh seafood to dine on each day.  Maybe throw in not being insane as well.